Romantic Gifts for Him: Esther Howland's Lace Valentines and a Note of Your Own

Love tokens have never needed to be grand to feel personal. In Worcester in the 1840s, Esther Howland saw imported lace valentines from England and began making her own designs through her father's stationery business. Some details of her story survive through local lore, but the history is clear in spirit: a small object can carry a whole message. That is the thread I would pull through romantic gifts for him: choose the object that calls back to a moment only you two would recognize.

Valentines moved from handmade tokens to commercial cards as advances in papermaking and printing brought mass-produced cards into production in the 1840s. That history makes me think about the difference between a label and a scent family. Eau de cologne is a light category at two to four percent fragrance, while in everyday language cologne can mean men's fragrance broadly. I would read the exact concentration and notes on the bottle rather than assume every cologne is the same kind of scent.

For a woodsy direction, Bleu de Chanel Eau de Parfum moves through citrus, cedar, tonka, vanilla and sandalwood. Azzaro's The Most Wanted gift set comes with a travel spray and hair-and-body wash, so he has a smaller version for a weekender. MYSLF Le Parfum marries black pepper and orange blossom to warm woods and vanilla bourbon; Sauvage Eau de Parfum has bergamot, vanilla absolute and patchouli in a refillable bottle. For evening, Oud & Bergamot Cologne Intense contrasts bergamot and cedarwood with oud, while Burberry Hero folds pine needles, incense, benzoin and three cedarwood oils together. Valentino Uomo Born in Roma Green Stravaganza adds coffee and vetiver, and Bal d'Afrique keeps a floral counterpoint on the shelf.

I would start by asking which bottle he already likes, then match its direction instead of guessing from a dramatic cap or box.

By the eighteenth century, sending gifts, love letters and handmade tokens was already a popular custom. Silk sleepwear feels like that tradition without the ceremony: private, useful, and chosen for the hour when the day is done.

Petite Plume's navy Silk Long Robe has a shawl collar and is machine washable, a useful point for a garment he may reach for often. HOM's Vineyard Short Pajama Set brings a navy Liberty print into a cotton button-front set; the shorts make it feel less like a uniform. The black Majestic International Dot Silk Robe has a small dot pattern and front pockets, while Petite Plume's Silk Pajama Set keeps the same navy in a long-sleeved top and trousers.

Zimmerli's silk-satin pajama set, with white piping and a flexible waist, is the most tailored of the group. Majestic International's dot pajamas and SILKSILKY's dark-blue lapel set offer silk in a shirt-and-trouser shape, while HOM's Brian Long Pajama Set uses a blue floral print in cotton. I would choose a robe if the fit is uncertain; matching sets need a closer look at his shirt and inseam measurements. Check the care label before wrapping, too, since these sets call for different wash routines.

Paper-and-ink valentines went mass-produced in the 1840s, but a keepsake still comes down to the detail he recognizes. On a watch, that detail may be a black dial; on a chain, the weight and finish are the message.

Tissot's PRX Powermatic 80 sets a black waffle dial against an integrated steel bracelet, with an automatic movement and an 80-hour reserve. The Hamilton Khaki Field Automatic uses a 38mm case, bold numerals and sapphire crystal, a good direction for a less dressy dial. Tissot's Classic Dream Automatic turns the dial silver and adds a date window; the Hamilton Jazzmaster Open Heart exposes part of its movement beneath a silver face. Longines offers a black-dial Conquest with a 72-hour reserve, or a Master Collection moon-phase watch with calendar details. The point is not to choose the most complicated face but the one he will want to look at.

David Yurman's silver box chain necklace has a 4.8mm profile and a lobster clasp; the matching bracelet is slimmer at 3.6mm. I would choose either if he likes a simple finish. What I would skip: a watch with a large case if he usually wears slim accessories. Compare the case diameter to a watch he already owns, and check that bracelet links can be adjusted before ordering.

Cashmere is the fine downy undercoat of the Kashmir goat, not simply another word for a soft knit. That is a useful distinction when the label is doing more talking than the sweater.

Quince's Mongolian Cashmere Fisherman Crewneck is a navy 7-gauge fisherman rib with raglan sleeves. Brooks Brothers' three-ply cardigan is British blue, spun by Scottish mill Todd & Duncan; the black turtleneck uses the same three-ply cashmere in ribbed form. Todd Snyder's Silk-Cashmere Crewneck has a double-layered collar, giving a black knit a little more structure without turning it formal.

Everlane's oatmeal Midweight Cashmere Crew combines cashmere with recycled content and saddle sleeves. For easier care, Bonobos' charcoal Washable Merino has a machine-wash note and lies flat to dry. Barbour's Fair Isle jumper brings a patterned lambswool option, while MR P.'s black crew is finely knitted from long-fiber cashmere. What I would skip: cashmere if he routinely wants to toss a sweater into the washer; Bonobos' merino is the practical alternate here. I would check fiber content and care instructions first, then compare the shoulder and body measurements with a knit he already wears.

A date-night gift should make a small plan feel easy, not prescribe a grand evening. The Aesop Aganice candle mixes cardamom, mimosa and a discreet tobacco note in an ivory ceramic vessel; Callippus brings vetiver, frankincense and shiso for a greener, incense-like direction. Diptyque's Narguilé candle warms honeyed fruit with tobacco and spiced amber, and its refillable jar gives the glass a longer role.

A shaker and glasses make a date at home feel like an invitation, not an assignment. The glass-and-antique-brass shaker has hand-hammered glass and a stainless-steel lid; the Modern Optic coupe glasses come as a set of four, mouth-blown and fire-polished, with faceted exteriors and smooth interiors. Misen's straight-edge steak knives add blue handles and full-tang construction to dinner. If he prefers a shared activity, the Polaroid Now+ Generation 3 Starter Set includes color film, app connectivity and two-lens autofocus; the Bouquet of Roses set builds 12 red roses and small white blossoms from bricks.

I would choose one mood maker rather than assembling a whole bar cart: candle and flowers if he likes a slow evening, coupes if he enjoys making a drink. What I would skip: the camera set if he never wants a record of the night. Keep the gift aligned with how he relaxes, not how a catalog stages a date.

Here's the order I would use: notice which scent family he likes, decide whether he will wear something or bring it home, then choose a single piece that supports that habit. A bottle works if he enjoys scent; a watch or silver chain if he keeps a few things close; a candle, shaker or flowers if what he wants is time together.

Then I would write one sentence that only belongs to the two of you. Esther Howland's cards were assembled by hand with paper and lace before her business grew. That is still the sweetest part of the exchange: a gift can be handsome, but it should feel addressed to him.

 

For more gift ideas: Romantic Gifts for Her, Holiday Gift Sets, White Elephant Gift Ideas, Christmas Gift Ideas.